Ranting 101 - Time to "Move On"!

Watching FOX news this morning. Blah, blah, blah.......................John Travolta just can't seem to move on after the death of his son. This was said by some scantily dressed anchorwoman that life has obviously not smacked up alongside the head yet. I can't remember when his son died but it hasn't been THAT long ago. There is no roadmap for grief.....ok now you can be angry-----oops! you've spent too long in phase 2 you NEED to go to phase 3. We all deal in a different way on a different time table and sometimes that is a REALLY slow table. In the "olden days" they did 40 days (I'm sure if this is wrong I'll get a correction. Thanks.) of screaming, weaping, lamenting, raging, tear clothes (ok you get the idea). It was the "grieving period". Now we get criticized if we don't show emotion at the funeral, criticized if we show emotion, we shun folks because WE don't know what to say (so say nothing except I Love You in the midst of a hug, handshake, etc.), some folks only stay in touch so they can gossip about the fact that "they aren't moving on. Poor things, but don't say anything". Ok I just googled and found out the death was in January. Somewhere around 180 days. For some this is a long time; for others NOT a long time. I have a friend back in Gillette I sang with for 10+ years in a quartet. She got smacked up alongside the head with life and about a year later the rest of us became a trio because she couldn't "move on". It actually took her about 5+ years to "move on"; to find a "new" normal; to create a different, but good, life. I know other folks that moved on in a few months. Me? Well, on June 27th it will be 7 years since our 13 year old son, K.C. went to be with the Lord and I have FINALLY found a new normal. This winter in NM we went for Ken's physical health and about March I realized I had found my new normal. This winter I spent hours and hours alone early in the morning before Ken got up. I spent time just quietly thinking, remembering, etc. It wasn't until Ken mentioned to some of our friends that I am happy (as opposed to content); eager for life (as opposed to whatever, ho hum) and ready for a new day (as opposed to days lasting 36 years).

Well, now I feel better!